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he asks his wife.Very helpful along the path to Self realization.I've gifted several copiesJai Malanie. .
If you are depressed over living in a codependent world and care-taking all the time this book will help you overcome that dependent relationship you are in.After you read this book it may be a good time to consider reading my book entitled "The Enlightenment, What God Told Me After One Million Prayers, a Message for Everyone" (See Profile Above) Codependent No More: How to Stop Controlling Others and Start Caring for Yourself by Melody Beattie is a straightforward guide with examples and exercises to help people who lose sight of their own needs and happiness when living and loving someone who is addicted to alcohol and other drugs.
Wish I had read it years earlier. This book was recommended to me and I was so impressed by it I bought it for my mother also. Was definitely the book I needed to read.
Not only does this book help explain co-dependency, it offers amazing strategies and activities to heal from it and learn new, healthy ways of relating to people.
Why am I so angry at my loved one, and myself. I really connected with Melody Beattie's definition of a codependent as a person "who has let another person's behavior affect him or her, and who is obsessed with controlling that person's behavior." It sounds simple, but encompasses a whole lot of misery and dysfunction. For example, I work with mothers, and I can see how maternal caregiving could easily slip into codependent caretaking of our children or other family members--with worry, anxiety, controlling, and failed rescue attempts--if we are not aware of these dynamics.Some readers may be turned off by Beattie's insistence on Twelve-Step programs (like AA and Al-Anon) and the Twelve Steps themselves and their "Higher Power" orientation, but even so I think this book is well worth reading.Being codependent can make you feel truly crazy and leave you wondering why. We've been doing the wrong things for the right reasons."Often this happens when dealing with a loved one who is abusing alcohol or drugs, but it can also arise in other situations in which a family member has an obsessive disorder or other problems.
The concept of codependency has made its way through our culture but I did not really know what it meant, so I went back to this original source to learn more.Bingo. Reading "Codependent No More" was like receiving an answer key that helped crack the code that explains the whole situation. Why can't I help my loved one. Eureka.
Every family would benefit from understanding these concepts. The solutions are not easy by any means, but it feels like a positive first step to have a deeper understanding of the dynamics at work; to learn that we are not alone, and discover there is a path forward. Light bulbs popping on. As Beatty quotes Scott Egleston, "Codependency is a way of getting needs met that doesn't get needs met.
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